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Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Shopping cart shenanigans

If grocery stores are a microcosm of the human race...and shopping carts are the way we show our effort levels...I don't want to be a part of this species anymore.


On two separate instances, I saw things that horrified me in their laziness/stupidity today.

Instance one: At lunch I walked over to the grocery store before heading home to get some food for a recipe I planned to make tonight. Walking across the street and alongside the parking lot, I witnessed a college-age boy come out of the store. He then skip-pushed (you know what I mean...where you run and jump up on the cart to glide along for a few moments) his way to what I assume was his mommy's Cadillac SUV to unload his groceries junk food. After depositing said food in the vehicle, he then got into the SUV. The cart was still in the empty spot next to him. I shook my head. What happened next is what made my jaw drop. He started the car, rolled down the window, grabbed the cart, and DROVE it to the cart return. It was 5 spaces away. I hope the scratches on mommy's car were worth your sad sack of lazy bones. If you are the future of our country, I'm moving.

Instance two: After work, because I didn't have the recipe in hand, I got to go back to said grocery store to collect two ingredients. During this walk over, I saw a guy, my age or older, walk his cart through the lot after unloading his groceries in his car...past another stranded cart...across a lane...to an empty spot...and leave his cart. He just walked the distance to the cart return...in the opposite direction. Not only that, but the stranded cart he walked past? Another patron was sitting in his car waiting to pull into that spot, thinking this guy was going to collect the cart for him so he could do so. So this guy SAW me watch him...saw the person and his wife in the car watch him...and still did a lazy, indecent thing with absolutely no remorse.

Where's natural selection when you need it? What shopping cart karma god will avenge their stupidity? Get your sh!t together, 'Murica. I call shenanigans.

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