New site!

Please go to www.abravenewadventure.com

{Happy} Friday funday with a splash of music

I watched the first :30 or so of this video and  set it up as a saved draft for next Wednesday's "music wednesday". As I finished watching the video, I realized I couldn't wait.

Thank you to Fast Co for bringing the initiative of this video to my attention. Just watching the promo clip made me smile from ear to ear and start tapping my foot along to the beat. The lyrics hold true, too, to what I'm trying to accomplish in my life and what I think I'm writing about searching for in this blog. I think a lot of people will be able to relate. I mean, look at the chorus:

"Because I’m happy

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof 

Because I’m happy 

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth 

Because I’m happy 

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you 

Because I’m happyClap along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do"

Sometimes we let others or the things around us get us down. Sometimes we let those things seal us and our happiness potential into a space too small....a room WITH a roof. We deserve to be happy, and we can be. We just have to act towards the things that make us that way and cast aside or ignore the things that don't.

I am really excited to see the full 24hr production and can only imagine the fun they had making it. The article mentions that this will be the first 24hr video produced and talks about the creative obstacles related to that. Pharrell actually has a really good quote about how creative obstacles are the best kind because they force us to push ourselves and think in new ways.

“The best work comes from people who are motivated by crisis--when something stops the original idea, they respond by coming up with something even better. Existence is all mathematics,” he says. “There’s an equation for success in every obstacle.”

I think this is true with every obstacle in our life, creative or otherwise. Thinking about, taking action, and overcoming something that was a hurdle in our life's path causes us to be an even better version of ourselves. And probably happier too!

Happy Friday guys.

Head(ache) first

I recently made the insane decision to switch from blogger-hosted blogging for both my personal and business website to self-hosting with godaddy and editing with wordpress. I had been hearing about better template design customization, user interface, etc and was getting frustrated with the "bloggy" look of their current template themes (especially for the business site). I'd also been asked by a friend about my knowledge base with WP because he had some work he could pass off to me if I could handle it. Seeing as I'm mere days away from unemployment (sorry, I know that's a whole new blog post in general I need to catch you up on), I figured a refresher in something that might make me some money was worth it.

I had used wordpress back in 2010 in Maine when I worked for JP Ware Design, doing research and posting content. I dove in head first. I thought it would be like riding a bike. Not so, young grasshoppah. Instead, I feel a bit like this:

I have a friend who runs IT at a firm...I think mostly bc she's the most competent of the bunch. It's not what she was hired to do, but she gets it done. Don't get me wrong, she's smart...just not super tech-y. Case in point: The other day she PRINTED out directions to a place we were going. I said the above to her as we were driving along and she pulled said wadded print of directions from her purse and tried to find what step she was on.

Well...karma? She's a b!tch.

I'm slowly getting there; neither site is ready for unveiling entirely. I'm wrapping my mind around plugins, typography, coding, overrides, themes. Hopefully when it's all said and done, I'll have two fabulous sites...please just appease me and nod your head "yes". There are a lot of decisions I need to make for them between now and then, some custom graphics I need to generate, and other goodies like that.

Oh, and find a job.

Let's hope that happens faster than the headache resulting from figuring out how to override typography settings in a theme. For now I think it's time to unplug so my eyes don't revolt from staring at a computer screen since 8am.

Mmmmmmnope. (Otherwise titled: Crazy Puppy)

I had my insight into dealing with an infant through the end of last week.

On Tuesday evening, around 9pm, I realized that Madeleine's upper muzzle was a bit swollen on both sides. I had no idea what she might have gotten into, and promptly called the vet to get info for a recommended emergency vet from their recording. I called to see what they thought I should do. Their response was "if she's had a reaction, you need to come in." And oh by the way, it's $100 just to walk in the door.

Mmmmmmnope.

So I got some Benadryl from the landlord and snuggled in for what I hoped would be an uneventful night.

Mmmmmmnope.

Around 1:30am I woke up to her rubbing her muzzle, dry heaving, and her left eye swollen halfway shut. I jumped out of bed, called the emergency vet for their address, threw on some clothes, and rushed out the door with the little girl. Two backseat vomits later and a 20min drive (that should've been 35) and I was at the vet trying to figure out what was wrong with Madeleine. They agreed that she'd had a reaction to something, but checked her temperature anyway to rule out infection (she'd only had her spay surgery a week and a half ago). No temp meant a steroid shot, wash of the paws (her), orders to continue giving Benadryl (me), and rest.

We finally got home and settled, after I mopped the floor in the kitchen in case the reaction was to a possible spilled chili powder mix flake or two. In bed by 4am, I shot off a quick email to work to let them know I would be working from home later that day.

She slept for most of the day, waking only for water and snuggles with her head in my lap while I worked at the computer. I spoke with her vet on the phone that afternoon, letting them know that the swelling was reducing and she appeared to be getting better. They wished us luck on the continued road to recovery, and said to keep them updated.

Around 6pm, as the third round of Benadryl was wearing off, Madeleine felt like eating again. It was wonderful to see her eating again. Or so I thought.

Mmmmmmnope.

About an hour later, she vomited...for the first time. I figured she just ate too fast, so I watched her eat when she went back for more, and got her to eat slower when she did. Thinking that would help.

Mmmmmmnope.

About 5 vomits later, I took her food away from her, remembering that I had some leftover white rice in the fridge from a previous night's dinner. I set that down for her to eat and she happily gobbled it up. I set up the stove to cook more...

And she vomited at my feet.

A 12hr turnaround and 9 vomits later, I was at work trying to help make a deadline, praying that she had finally vomited the last time and the bland rice was starting to help. I worked until lunch and came home to check on her. Still puny as ever, I emailed in to say I'd be working the afternoon from home due to her state of puny and a vet checkup at 2pm.

The vet said what I had assumed. It was whatever she had gotten into just working its way through her body. They said that the steroid shot and the Benadryl had been masking the intestinal side of it, but now that those drugs had mostly worn off, we were seeing the tail end of the reaction finishing its course. Her swelling was all but gone, but I could tell by her eyes she was still feeling pitiful.

By this time, she hadn't thrown up since just before work, so I opted not to do the anti-nausea shot and instead just take her home for more Gatorade and white rice. In case you're ever wondering, dogs will drink blue Gatorade. It's the adult version of Pedialyte and all I had on hand. 7.5 cups of white rice later, no vomits, and lots of gatorade and water, I think we were finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

There were so many times I looked at her over those 60 hours, feeling helpless, asking "What did you get into? What do you need? What do I do?" I'm sure I experienced something akin to what new parents feel the first time(and I'm sure every time after, if they're good parents) their kid is sick. Do I feel ready?

Mmmmmmnope.

But I'll keep practicing with my little lady and hopefully some day I will be.

Project 365: Week 8 Recap

DAY 47: I think she knows we have a visitor coming in town this week.

DAY 48: Miss M's first snow. Can't wait to see what she does with more than a dusting.

DAY 49: Follow-up check for the pitiful pup at the vet after a rough couple days.

DAY 50: Beautiful fall flowers and cuddling with the pup while catching up on shows.

DAY 51: Drinks with the cousins at Libertine. Definitely on the "must return for more" list.

DAY 52: Image of all the Grand Nationals finalists lined up for awards to begin. My baby sister's awesome band got third! IN THE NATION!

Shopping cart shenanigans

If grocery stores are a microcosm of the human race...and shopping carts are the way we show our effort levels...I don't want to be a part of this species anymore.

On two separate instances, I saw things that horrified me in their laziness/stupidity today.

Instance one: At lunch I walked over to the grocery store before heading home to get some food for a recipe I planned to make tonight. Walking across the street and alongside the parking lot, I witnessed a college-age boy come out of the store. He then skip-pushed (you know what I mean...where you run and jump up on the cart to glide along for a few moments) his way to what I assume was his mommy's Cadillac SUV to unload his groceries junk food. After depositing said food in the vehicle, he then got into the SUV. The cart was still in the empty spot next to him. I shook my head. What happened next is what made my jaw drop. He started the car, rolled down the window, grabbed the cart, and DROVE it to the cart return. It was 5 spaces away. I hope the scratches on mommy's car were worth your sad sack of lazy bones. If you are the future of our country, I'm moving.

Instance two: After work, because I didn't have the recipe in hand, I got to go back to said grocery store to collect two ingredients. During this walk over, I saw a guy, my age or older, walk his cart through the lot after unloading his groceries in his car...past another stranded cart...across a lane...to an empty spot...and leave his cart. He just walked the distance to the cart return...in the opposite direction. Not only that, but the stranded cart he walked past? Another patron was sitting in his car waiting to pull into that spot, thinking this guy was going to collect the cart for him so he could do so. So this guy SAW me watch him...saw the person and his wife in the car watch him...and still did a lazy, indecent thing with absolutely no remorse.

Where's natural selection when you need it? What shopping cart karma god will avenge their stupidity? Get your sh!t together, 'Murica. I call shenanigans.

My dog requires more maintenance than me

So when I first got Madeleine, I knew that at some point I would try to teach myself how to groom/cut her hair myself. Not because I find it fun, or enjoying, but because I'm a frugal gal. I mean...I'm the girl who hasn't cut her own hair since July. No, not this July. I mean July 2012. That happens when your hair trimmings revolve around being long enough for donation. But I also don't have bangs, like this crazy mop dog.

Morning of grooming festivities.

Anyway. Haircuts. I used to cut my ex-husband's hair. How hard could it be?

Really hard. 

For serious. I now have a gained respect for groomers and barbers of tiny humans. Madeleine flailed like an epileptic psycho anytime I tried to get near her head or her paws. I was able to get all of her torso and down her legs, with much struggling and biting - her, not me, obviously. I then put her muzzle on her because the bites were starting to hurt, and realized...well...this isn't going to work, I can't even get to her face to shave it now.

Soooo....an emergency call to the groomer and a rushed drive to make it there for the last booking, and everything's all better (Sorry, landlord. I'll pick up those dog shavings tomorrow). She's cut a little short for her size. Kind of pitiful-looking, actually. But it's cut and out of her eyes and should last through winter.

The groomer gave me all sorts of hell. I walked in and she said "you tried to cut her yourself, didn't you?" Why yes, yes I did. And I will continue to do so because paying more for my dog to get groomed more frequently than my every year and a half hair cut is bag o' cats crazy, if you ask me.

She actually said I did a pretty good job, that the face and paws are obviously the hardest. She giggled and said, "It looks like she has little boots on"...because of the line on the leg past which Madeleine would begin to gyrate like a person in need of an exorcism. Yes, funny funny ha ha. This isn't an UGG commercial. Please fix it.

But she wanted to give Madeleine poofs and crazy bananas stuff. No ma'am. I don't plan on bringing a high-maintenance dog into my life and I've done pretty good at preventing that so far. No poofs, or pink, or bows of any kind. She sulked back into the grooming station and said she'd call when Madeleine was ready. Maybe that was why she buzzed so short. Revenge of sorts.

My pretty girl is quickly growing into her new haircut...which is also growing as quickly as she is. She's like the velveteen rabbit right now. The short chop is soft and cuddly. Which is good because I feel bad that she looks naked and appears cold and am therefore letting her break rules and cuddle with me at night. Bad mommy, I know. You can slap my wrists later.

For now, I'm going to go cuddle.

Project 365: Week 7 Recap

DAY 42: Bigger cone of shame! No more licking the incision site for this little gal.

DAY 43: Fall beauty in Woodruff Place

DAY 44: I love running across reminders to keep your fire burning.

DAY 45: No matter my day, she makes me smile.

DAY 46: Post-mop chop. Cuddling with Amy at girls' night.

Friday Fun-day with words of action

A follow-up to yesterday. MAKE this weekend great!

TED Thursday: The investment of action

Forget about having an identity crisis & get some identity capital. Do something that adds value to who you are. Do something that's an investment in who you might want to be next." - Amy Cuddy

I posted this quote over the weekend. It spoke to me in the sense of moving forward and all of the steps you take to create the person you are, and the person you will become. Your actions are your investment.

A friend commented on the post that Amy had presented a really good TED talk...and after watching it - I totally agree! Thanks Charlotte!

In the talk, Amy speaks on the inverse of the age-old idea that our thoughts influence our actions. While the old adage "happy thoughts make happy lives" makes me grit my teeth sometimes, I understand that if you only dwell on one thing, it can become overwhelming. She chose, however, to look at the inverse. That your actions, the physical way in which you present or carry yourself, affect your thoughts. 

In a non-experiment scenario, read: the real world, this almost feels like a chicken-egg debate. If you're slouching in your seat, is it because you subconsciously don't want to be seen. Or is it because you don't want to be seen that you slouch. Does the person who is confident think confidence and therefore walk taller, or do they walk taller and therefore feel more confident?

Not the point right now.

The point, to me at least, is that actions count. Everything affects everything. Non-actions have an affect too, but what is the investment in your future when you do nothing? Are you creating any future by sitting still? Probably not.

These actions are also, as she mentioned, really good social cues. Especially when words can be so overused and under-meant nowadays - and yes I say that fully aware that my blog could be considered an overuse of words. The thing is, I try my hardest to back my words with actions.

But when people aren't good with words, all you're left with are actions. Your actions, even just the crossing of your arms, the way you sit in a group of people, the nod of a head...they're all social cues to the people around you. And they all affect how those people perceive your intentions and act towards you. Your actions are your investment in your future. They are the possible transaction of value to a better you...or a worse one.

Every day is a transaction. How are you investing in your future?

Dance party Wednesday

For this week's music Wednesday, I thought I'd share a track with you that immediately lifts my mood and always gets me up bouncing around. Even if I'm by myself, in the car, it's my own little dance party.

This past week has been stressful and this song helps remind me that sometimes you just have to shake it off and dance it away.

Happy dance party, everyone!

Enough

So after my "bring it, dating world" post, I began thinking about the data points the single men on the market (who are worth dating and spending a future with) might also have. And wondering if I would live up to those standards. Like I said, "Divorcee with dog and no steady income"...doesn't really attract the men.

I would've never expected to be divorced, still not licensed in my field, and without a full-time job at this point in my life. I wouldn't have expected to be sleeping alone, spending holidays with friends and family instead of a man who holds my heart. I think as a child I would've pitied my current/then-future self. The outsider sees loneliness, a woman unloved.

If only I could tell her that her heart is worth treasuring. That the life she sees shouldn't be pitied, but aspired to - maybe lacking the divorce and adding jobs.

That life is worth living...fully...not just surviving.

That sometimes the road worth taking isn't easy, but that she has enough in her to make it through the rough spots.

That she should never let the fire, the strength, in her die. It is the sparkle that sets her apart. It should be cherished by herself and should be respected and cherished by the man who will someday hold her heart.

Those are the things I hope little girls growing up now know. They are the things I grew up being taught. And they are the things that, when faced with the possibility of a future of bad dates, remind me now that I am worth the work. I should be treasured, just as I will treasure the man who will have my heart.

I am enough.

Project 365: Week 6 Recap

DAY 35: 3Mass by Schmidt Associates with urban art in the foreground on a beautiful fall day.

DAY 36: London fog takes over downtown Indy.

DAY 37: Hello beautiful fall colors.

DAY 38: Second battle wound for Flashdance...I guess he was talking back. Time to get out the needle and thread again. 

DAY 39: Pathetically precious puppy, still in a bit of a drug-induced stupor the night of her spay surgery.

DAY 40: The drugs have worn off and now she's just ornery. Trying to lick stitches = cone of shame.

DAY 41: Anyone else feel like a martini? Ornery day 2. Post-op day 3. These stitches can't heal fast enough.

Halloween in November?

Typically anything and everything Halloween is promptly packed away and not talked about again until next year starting the moment the clock strikes 12. Ironically, we don't turn into the Cinderella pumpkins, but rather the pumpkins disappear.

However, because of Indiana's asinine decision to postpone trick or treating due to "inclement" weather possibilities last night, TODAY is Halloween. (This topic could be a whole blog post in and of itself) So I don't feel bad posting a Halloween related funny for Friday Fun-day. Enjoy! Happy Halloween/Dia de los Muertos!!*

*There's a non-PC 'Murica/Spanish joke in there somewhere, but I'm just going to leave it alone.

TED Thursday: The world of online dating

I came across this TED talk today. A girl, recently out of a relationship, who loves data and connecting the dots and makes a mean timeline. She's a planner. Any of that sound familiar?

I found myself laughing out loud at a couple parts, loving how she broke down the system to find what she needed. The talk is hilarious. Give it a listen.

As I've talked to friends, most of whom are happily married, about the re-entry to the single world...they are at a loss for advice on how to meet guys. You can't just stroll across the Quad or go to a new class next semester and hope you find a cutie worth getting to know. And most of these happily married friends? Have friends who are happily married. So they can't troll their friends for possible dates for me, either. Time and time again, their answers were "what about online dating?"

There are so many thoughts that come to mind with that simple question. Because it doesn't feel so simple. Which site would I choose? Where do I even begin when it comes to setting up a profile? How much/how little information do I tell? What happens when no one emails/pokes/responds/messages/(insert whatever it is you do to chat on online dating because I'm so clueless here) me?

This lady took those frustrations and her skillset and made it work for her. It's hilarious...and ingenious. While I don't plan on engineering a handful of fake profiles, I applaud her for doing the legwork. And the moral of the story is: the legwork paid off. Sometimes, alright - most times, boys are dumb and they need help putting their shoes on, let alone finding someone who could conceivably become a life partner - so the creepy fake profiles seem less creepy when it pays off. Alright, the shoes are probably an overstatement, but I bet every girl reading this is nodding her head.

It all seems laughable to me.

[Find site]

[Create account with boringly literal or strangely funny username to lure boys]

[Insert picture]

[Add stupid quip that continues to attract said boys]

I'm pretty sure "Divorcee with dog and no steady income" is not the product of the algorithm that ends in my favor. That is not the milkshake that brings the boys to the yard.

I'm also pretty sure that my list would have at least 72 data points.

But what I do know FOR A FACT...is that I have awesome friends who will remind me along the way that he is out there and I just have to keep living and working and someday my man of action will show up.

Bring it, dating world. Smileygirl1978 ain't got nothin' on this milkshake*.

*In fact, it appears she hasn't even seen a milkshake in awhile.

Building my future

While I joke about being okay with being a single gal, and I am, I also know that at some point in my future I will want to be an independent-minded woman staring at the adventures of my future with an independent-minded man at my side. I won't NEED him there, but I will want him to share in the experiences with me. And he won't NEED me there, but will equally want me.

I spent many nights mulling over the issues of my last relationship, both while it was happening and after the fact. I've learned from it. I may not ever know exactly what changed, but I've taken away from it the things I know will make me an even better partner in the future. And I also understand that there's no looking back. There's no sense in constantly re-hashing in my mind the events that occurred and the events that didn't. I will always enjoy the fond memories that I have of times past, but the memories aren't the present, and they hadn't been in awhile. You can't remain happy only from memories of long ago.

Just as you can't live in the past for happiness, you can't live in the past for sadness. You move on, you learn, you build your future forward.

And so I work on bettering myself, continually. I work on sorting out in my mind and planning for the life I'd like to have. I work on doing the things I love and being the person I want to be. I work on being happy, and doing the things that make me happy. I work on enjoying the moment. I'm building my life for the future.

I am a woman of action. And I know, both from that acknowledgement and from past experiences, that I want and need a man of action. A man who can help carry the load when it gets heavy. A man who will work with me, side by side, through the good days and the bad, to continually make our relationship the best it can be. Who will put in the effort to make the relationship great without making it feel like work. A man who will say nice things to me, both romantic and funny, to make me smile and laugh, but will also then follow those words with actions that reinforce the thought. A man who will call me on my sh!t when I get too sassy for my shoes (as Katie will attest I am apt to do), but love me just the same when the dust settles.

Does that man exist?

Who knows. I hope so. But until then, you can find me building my future...

Who cares, I'm awesome

On a related note to my blessed post, where I mentioned a couple ways in which I'm getting over the single hurdle with the help of friends and family, I have another "single gal" funny for you.

One night last week, I was sitting at the computer working and saw a mouse - literally SAW IT - skitter across the floor from the living room to the kitchen. I texted the landlord who came through with 4 traps, two different kinds, and tips on setting them that night.

The next day, upon arriving home from work, I was greeted with the present of a mouse in a trap. After getting over the initial shock - not sure why I was shocked, exactly. After all, that was the intent when I set them - I walked over to gather the trap/mouse and dispose of it outside.

And then it jumped.

Holy blazes of hellfire.

What's funny to me now is: I jumped in a circle like a little girl, screaming and waving my hands....while it hopped the trap in a circle, screeching and trying to get loose.

And Madeleine? She was having a field day with the crazy.

So...I texted the landlord. He wasn't home to remedy the mouse situation (come to find out he's not a fan of mice either). Nor were any of my friends in a close distance. It was big girl pants time. I put the bag back over my hand, kicked the trap around so that I could pick it up from trap end, and went for it.

And then it squeaked.

And I dropped it.

And squeaked myself.

Round two was more successful and the mouse is now in mouse heaven somewhere. And me? I rewarded myself with a beer. No man needed here. I got this sh!t under control.

Project 365: Week 5 recap

DAY 28: Flashdance has officially made it through the first two months of puppy teething, but was in dire need of a bath and a sewing patch on one of his feet. He took a day off for both, and is now back with Madeleine. You would've thought he was real, as happy as she became when I gave him back to her after his patch and cleaning.

DAY 29: This morning while I was getting ready for work, Madeleine started playing with something. I thought she might've found an amethyst, so I ran over and claimed the unknown object: a baby molar she had just lost.

DAY 30: What happens when you go to work early before the sun is up and just grope for your flats with your feet as you're running out the door? You end up spending the morning in two different shoes without realizing it.

DAY 31: Last night I noticed a mouse, so I put out some traps the landlord gave me. I came home from work today to a maimed, but not dead, mouse in one of them. With no one available to remedy the situation, I put on my big girl pants and took care of it myself. And then rewarded myself with beer.

DAY 32: A good friend came into town for a party this weekend and called me up to catch up over dinner. It's always great to commiserate lives and compare how our firms work, both similarly and differently. We had a great time over bourbon-based drinks and tacos.

DAY 33: I spent my afternoon with a good friend, and making new friends, carving pumpkins. I can't remember the last time I had done this and this experience did not disappoint. Spiced apple cider, also known as "life juice", laughs, and good music. Wins all-around.

DAY 34: I'm pretty sure this is my favorite pumpkin I've ever carved. Awesome handle. Awesome coloring. Awesome. Awesome. Awesome.

What does your weekend hold?

Live it up.

Give a little

I know I'm a day late on Music Wednesday. I blame the plague that visited over the weekend. Anyway...

This song makes me want to boogie around the apartment in my undies. It's got a great beat, and I think the message applies in all aspects of life, but especially love. If we all focused on giving, making others happy, TRULY happy, I think most relationships - personal, business, friendships - would benefit greatly.

This will be a struggle for me having had to take care of my own happiness for so long, but I already see how happy I am currently and am becoming as I grow in my new life. It makes me excited to find the person out there who will willingly and gladly be my equal and give happiness to me as I will give to him.

But for now, dance party time.

The S#!t Show that was Sunday

Now that I'm a couple days removed, I can laugh at myself a little.

Sunday...was brutal. Talk about death march.

I felt like a complete sh!t show.

Thankfully I only felt this way, not WAS this way.

In the process of trying to figure out why I was hurting so much, I played internet doctor and now know where my appendix and gallbladder are located. Good news, the pain source wasn't at either of those locations.

I also realized that I need to change my living will. (I realized this before I realized where my appendix was. While in a fever-induced delirium, I was concerned my stabbing pain was appendicitis.)

I was laying on the couch in fetal position, whimpering, thinking...ok, if I go to the ER...who do I call? Who is my emergency contact? F#(k, I need to change my will. Katie gets all my sh!t (You're welcome). I need to write this down. I don't want to get up to get a pen and paper. I don't even think I CAN get up to get a pen and paper. They'll just have to take dictation in the ambulance. Mooooaaaaannnn. Whimper.

I'm not kidding about the whimpering. It was PATHETIC. If there were drunk kids milling about, they would have vine'd me like nobody's business. I would be almost asleep (I think) and wake up to whimpering sounds even I didn't know I made.

Plus side: I cleaned the toilet on Saturday.

Negative: It now needs to be cleaned again.

Plus side: Really awesome diet.

Negative: If you enjoy hurling your favorite comfort foods and convulsing like the girl from The Exorcist.

Plus side: Good workout from all muscles being tensed while in a feverish shake all day.

Negative: You feel like you were pummeled by a MMA fighter the next day.

Oh, did I mention, while all of this was going on, my dog ate the head off of a dead bird? Yeah, that happened.

Another's brave journey

A dear friend lost his job today. I know this blog is about me and my journey, but so much of me is given strength by the close knit group of friends I am lucky to have (see here and here) - so for me, his journey is my journey. As he is my friend, I am his. And today I feel for him.

I almost don't know where to begin; all of the thoughts seem to be swirling like an unkempt merry-go-round, tumbling around with the mismatched clothes in the dryer (because why the hell would a merry-go-round be in the dryer? My point exactly. Bag o' cats up there). I pained that I didn't know how to come to his aid today, and I myself have heard - and been frustrated by - too much of "I know how you feel" lately to be able to utter those words to him as he shared the news with his friends. I've had to leave a job, many jobs in fact, in the past because of military moves, but have yet been stationary and without. So I don't, truly, know how it feels. I found myself wanting to say it, and bit my tongue as we spoke. Remembering how those words felt like a hot hand on my cheek when others said them to me.

But I empathize nonetheless.

The world of architecture right now, and in recent years, is not an easy one. While most of the nation struggled/struggles under a max 8% unemployment rate, architecture has been almost double that at times - and still sits above the national average. Even so, he is a talented architect. He is goal-oriented and attuned to details. He is so worthy of a blessed future and I can only imagine how downtrodden he feels tonight.

He is one to always see the design in things, how something relates to another. Another friend described him recently as "the big picture" guy. When I saw this quote today, I immediately thought of him.

I hope he realizes the support structure he has. His family. His friends. His peers. I hope he realizes his value to the profession. I hope he sees this as a chance to redirect the journey, rather than a collapsed bridge. I have many hopes, but mostly I hope he finds peace in the unsettled moments, both now and in the immediate future.

I know he is a believer, so I will end with this, because no one ever says it better than He does.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11

We're all in your corner. Know that, if you know anything.